grr

Woke up irritated and am going to bed the same, not got any better as the day has gone on , possibly the forum i have been reading is not such a good idea , dont know

will update properly in the next few days

nite xx

I havent been on in a while but will update later today xx

Angel Baby community is raising founds to print 1st edition of AB keepsake booklets for the distribution to the maternity hospitals . We need your help to make this happen .We as, community truly believe that these books are so needed right across the globe and AB is about bringing a change to support parents need right than and there ♥

The initial cost of $1570 for 3000 books requires a further $150 for every next 1000 books to be printed .
One booklet will cost AUD$0.65 ♥ 10 booklets $AUD6.50 ♥

Just think , if you can spare a cost of a cup of coffee , you will help to support 4 - 6 angel families , for the cost of any lunch fast food meal ? 10 - 14 families will receive not only a keepsake but the link to the support , link to our community . When a child grows their angel wings , the feeling of isolation is a overwhelming. Our youngest angel is 5 weeks gestation , oldest is 8 years of age . Together as community ,we can make a difference.


Every donor will receive an electronic certificate of appreciation ♥ your Precious Angel or Angels will be listed in the Loving Memory of page on AB site ♥ ♥ Memorial

* How to make a payment :

* go to your paypal account

* send money

* email address

* support@ourangelbaby.org

* choose GIFT as payment option ( no charges deducted of your donation )

* and add amount you wish to donate ...in comments please add your dedication for your Precious Angel ♥ so we can update the Memorials page with his / her name ♥

* approximate exchange rates :USD$5.00 = AUD$6.00 * AUD$5.oo =CAD$ 6.00 AUD$5.00 = GBP 3.90

* AB keepsake booklets will have a full colour cover , black and white A5 internal pages

* Inside cover


Certificate of Life

Name: ________________________

Precious child of
____________________________

Born on: ____________________________

Time: ____________

Place: _________________________

Weight: ______________ Length: ____________

Head circumference: ____________

Delivered by: _______________________


* 2nd page special paper for imprints * Your precious child’s Hand and feet ink prints*

* pages 3 through 5 your wishes and wisdom form Time with your Angel page on our website x

* 6 blank pages to write the memories


Thank you for your support , every book will make an impact , every donation will make a difference , no matter how small . Please copy and post this post to your blogs and word-press .

One month my tiny man

One month today Payton grew Angel wings and im not doing so well, im tired and down. Keep bursting into tears , i did fall asleep last night , but woke up about 20 minutes later holding my tummy , and at first thought i was still pregnant, when i was awake properly and realised im not it was like a knife turning in my chest and i had to get up to throw up, high anxiety today and im not sure what to do with myself.

April is coming up fast, with rillee's 1 year Angelversary and Horowai's Edd and the closer it gets to these days the more anxious and down i feel. I am missing them a lot, knowing that i should be holding Rillee and that i should also be very pregnant with bubba , AND that i should be pregnanat with Payton is making my head spin and my chest ache.

Wish my body hadnt failed my babys and myself, And it did , im not an idiot, i know it has to be me. Three babys in a row cant be a coincedence , i am the thing that stayed the same, two dads for three babys and me. Im not stupid :( and on the other hand i dont want to be going to the doctor yet to "explore" anything, i just want my children, not future children, this is not my problem, i want my Angels , i want my children who i have already failed :(( i want to be able to have them here or to see them for even a minute so i could tell them how much i love them , and tell them im sorry , to see for myself that they are safe and ok.

Trying to decide whether i should just crawl back into bed and pull the blankets over my head


<3 Payton <3
<3 Rillee <3
<3 Horowai <3

...

haven't posted in a while so thought i should.

lots of thing going on and hard to explain some of them, but i am feeling very drained and emotional, even the smallest thing set me off in either a angry meltdown or an anxious , crying one.

Not sure if im here or there, up or down.

missing my babys a lot , Payton has been an Angel for 22 days now and im struggling to find the "good" side of anything

have had a few days where all i have wanted is to be with my babys, i never do anything , but sometimes i wish i had the courage, some would say its a good thing i dont.. so i guess im stuck here for however long , doing whatever until one day things might pick up or God might give me a bit of grace and leave me be.

I am so greatful to my good friends , who have been helping me stay afloat lately, especially my adopted siamese twin , love you <3 thank you <3 ((((( <3 ))))



<3 Rillee <3 Horowai <3 Payton <3